This one's not a new note; rather it’s more about my last one. About the last note of mine some people held the view that it should me more coherent and in the passage rather than me being a masochist it seemed that I am pained by the pain of others, so the note was a bit unsuitable. People took it as sad and wondered why this sadness within me.
On the other hand there were also people who did take it as gloomy and good. They did suggest me once to take it off the blog and said the note isn't for people who thought that it needs more coherence.
Come to think of it, why did I really put that note on blog, in public, to know what people thought about it? Why did I show to two completely different individuals? Am I really pained by the pain of others? Does it really need to be more coherent or it doesn't really belong to the group who wants it to be more coherent?
Heck no! I clearly mentioned, trust me I really am a sadist, call me insane I would like that better. I wanted to know, how deep it cuts down when I see the crowd talking about it and analyzing what, how and why I write such. I am tired of the pain within myself; I am getting immune to it. Now I wish to be more pained watching the crowd analyzing me. I want them to talk about me and hate me. I want them to realize how ugly I am inside.