confused

Its almost 6 in the evening, the weather’s fine outside but inside our houses there’s a power cut. End of Feb and its hot & humid here in Mumbai, I stil kant stop wondering how can people stay witout winters? It is supposed to be d best season. I am quite a lazy ass, I genraly go off to sleep whenevr thr’s a power cut cos I dnt get what to do. And again I wonder how people in past survived witout these electronic gadgets? Have I becm too mechanical lately? I rely don’t noe and evn if I tried I believe d last thg I wud b able 2 undrstan n explain in my life would be my own self.

At times I think I ‘ve a lot of set of laws in life and I like a ideal human abide by al those rules. And there r times when I also think I don’t ve ne set f rules in my life, I can’t stick to one thing & I change so very often. Coming to think f it, who ‘m I 2 decide wht is moral o just and wht's not? Who ‘m I 2 decide ne set f laws? Given a topic frm life, death o nethg else I wud probably stand for d subject at times & also b against it at othr times and stil wud take myslf as true in bth d cases. Apart from 1 single thg which is stagnant in my life evrythg else seems 2 keep changing. Tht one inactive thg is tht ,“I ‘m stil tryin 2 figure out how dis crowd wrks” tht’s d only thg in my life I belive 2 which I ve sticked 4 so long n stil like a parasite clinging 2 d same ques tryin 2 figure out smthg. And yea, its no mad chase I truly belive me being a parasite is worth smthg cos evrytime I slow dwn in my search d crowd does cm up wit smthg tht leaves me wit al d mre strength 2 keep my search gng.

Between whenevr I think f writin smthg I dnt noe y I turn 2 write smthg else n not d thg I thot I wud ve talkd abt. Like here I took out paper n pen not 2 talk abt how dis wrld amuses me but rathr smthg else.